Now, this is a story all about how
My business got butt-fucked into the ground
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the bitch of the Internet.
In New Jersey, born and raised,
Stealin' money is how I spent most of my days,
Relaxin', Scammin', Chillin' all Jew,
Tryin' to think of some new ways to sue,
When an anon
Who was up to no good
Started wantin' refunds in my neighborhood,
I got a couple of emails, and I got scared
And I called my three lawyers as fast as I could.
I sent a few emails, telling them I'd sue
And the internet responded with a big "FUCK YOU"
If anything I can say I'd fucked up this time
But I thought 'Naw forget it' - 'I'm a tough guy, they'll see."
My website went down about ten minutes after
And I found dead animals, hangin' from my rafters
I looked at my life
I was finally done
I fought the Internet and the Internet won.